You’ve probably heard of birth doulas: a companion who supports birth parents with information and emotional support before, during and after birth. The word “doula” is Greek for servant or helper, and a doula companion is just that, someone who provides non-medical support to a family through end-of-life support and the grief process. Death doulas are an emerging profession in Canada.

Caring for yourself and your family through grief

Death and funerals have become so medicalized and financialized that family caregivers may forget to care for their emotional and mental health needs, at this time. The purpose of doula support is to educate and guide families, helping them experience death as a natural and necessary part of a healthy life. 

This is particularly important for family caregivers who are charged with providing palliative care for a loved one. Caregivers have a heavy workload, not just in the physical sense, but in a deeply emotional manner that can be exhausting, scarring and frustrating. 

Doulas can help you feel more prepared, connected, supported and empowered. This ultimately leads to a better end of life and death care experience.

The role of a death doula

Doula services begin with a conversation, one where they offer assistance to a family, namely the individual approaching end of life. Doulas help develop a plan to incorporate family values, needs, goals and abilities, aligning with their end of life wishes.

Before your loved one passes, a doula can provide support, networks and information to help ease the burden of care and plan for the end of life. 

Doulas are staunch companions and advocates through the process of death. And they are readily available to support you with understanding rights and responsibilities. They can help create a sacred space to share final memories, embrace the bittersweet gifts of the journey, and prepare to say farewell. 

Doulas can also connect you to information and services for funeral and estate management, and help simplify decision-making during a period where you’re not at your best. They help your family navigate the death care industry as well, ensuring you’re receiving the best value for your money even when you don’t have the energy to explore your options. Finally, they lead you through the loss experience and grieving process.

“We focus on the unique needs of individuals and families during times of change or crisis,” describes Beverley Shiels, end of life doula and CEO of Courageous Goodbyes. “We are companions, advocates, liaisons, educators and supporters during times of transition and fear relating to the senior years, loss of independence, terminal illness, death and grief.”

Death doulas in the Edmonton area

I work closely with Beverley and believe her approach to be holistic and nurturing; she can be reached through courageousgoodbye.com.

Endoflifedoulaassociation.org is another excellent resource for finding a death companion or exploring end of life conversations.